Archive for the ‘The Trill Spot’ Category

Too Cool To Be Loved by @TrillahMNM

Posted: May 15, 2015 in The Trill Spot
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The other day I jacked a page out of Flychologists book and tweeted “At the end of the day….we all just want someone we can say the (Childish Gambino) “3005” chorus to.” A few people retweeted it, a few favorited it, which is cool because I guess it means people agree with it. A few hours later while working I got a notification that someone had replied to my tweet so I checked to see what they said. Basically it was some guy saying if someone said the “3005” chorus to him that he would break up with them. I just sat there in the middle of work staring at my phone trying to figure out why would someone would say something like that. It made no sense to me, why would you break up with someone cause they told you that they like you? All I could do was shake my head and hope the dude wasn’t serious but knowing these new niggas nowadays you can’t really tell.

The whole thing made me realize something, a lot of you people are single because you’re way too cool to be in a relationship. Y’all think you aren’t but you really are. You can’t fathom the thought of doing anything that might be considered corny by all these other people that are also too cool to be in a relationship that you trying to impress. Let me break it to you idiots, BEING IN A RELATIONSHIP IS CORNY. Everyday isn’t going to be Christmas morning and and everynight isn’t going to be Valentines Day night. There will be a lot of “boring nights” and things in between those “great days” but you lying to yourself if you think that watching Netflix by yourself with a bag full of dollar menu items is just as dope as watching Netflix with someone who cares about you and a real meal. Some of you are way too busy trying to sell people on you being too good for practical dating yet you’re practical people. You aren’t special, you’re the person waiting for the bus telling the other people at the bus stop that cars are wack.You’re the person watching Netflix by yourself all weekend in your underwear from two days ago because you had no plans but you out here frontin for us like you somehow above having someone non-blood related actually care about you. Well we don’t believe you, you need more people…or maybe just one person. Maybe I should just mind my business and let you guys be too cool. You gonna be cool as shit at those family gatherings with your family secretly questioning your sexuality because you been showing up solo your whole life but that’s what y’all want so don’t let me interfere with your happiness.

 

Trillah Out.

#Love#Kiss#NewYears

Don’t Be That Guy by @TrillahMNM

Posted: May 18, 2014 in The Trill Spot
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Life is full of idiots,dickheads,assholes,douchebags,cunts or whatever word you want to use to describe them. Nothing you do outside of a mass murder killing spree will change that. All you can do is make sure you aren’t a fuckboy and that you don’t raise the youth you come in contact with to be fuckboys.While you make your journey through life, let me give you some quick examples of guys you don’t ever want to be.

1 – Don’t be that guy who picks his girl up from her job blasting the most vulgar rap song out and staring down her male co-workers as they exit. If she is cheating on you or is going to cheat on you, there’s a good chance that it’ll be with one of them. Don’t give them the ammo to clown you with and tear the walls down from within…the wall of her job. You really want dudes in your girls ear telling her how much of a clown you are eight hours a day, five days a week? Eggzactly.

2 – Don’t be that guy who is equal height or shorter than his woman and then forbids her to wear high heels. That’s just petty bro. Obviously height isn’t that big of a deal to her if she’s fucking with you so why would you make it one. When you stunt a womens growth even if it’s fake growth, the next guy that doesn’t can get the draws. If she ever cheats on you or you two ever break up I guarantee the next dude will be taller than you.

3 – Don’t be that guy that goes to the corporate office party under-dressed, gets drunk, and begs the DJ all night to play the hoodest hood shit out. Your co-workers and bosses don’t need to know that you get buck like and they’ll be laughing at you, not with you. Focus more on the corporate and less on the party. Do you really want your boss looking at you as a potential assault or sexual harassment case down the line?

4 – Don’t be that guy who only dates other races and slanders his races women. Every race of women have their own unique set of hangups and a few of them can be attributed to just being women. You don’t date your race, that’s your business but you don’t have to broadcast it to anyone that’ll listen to you. If you have to put something down to uplift your choice then your choice must not be that great cause it sounds like you trying to convince yourself. People in a better place don’t waste time complaining about the shittier place. If the grass is really greener on the other side of the fence then why are you still complaining about the grass that you not dealing with anymore? Go enjoy the good grass.

5 – Don’t be that guy who goes out with his friends and gets knockdown carry out drunk. We’re all adults bruh, no one came out to babysit you like you a child. Get blackout drunk at home or on your own time.

6 – Don’t be that guy who eats ass. Just don’t, you’re ruining it for men everywhere. Nobody respects an ass eater either. Not even the person with the ass you just ate. Seriously, don’t be that guy.

Your friend, Trillah

Trillahs Life Advice for 2014 by @TrillahMNM

Posted: January 5, 2014 in The Trill Spot
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Trillahs Life Advice for 2014 by @TrillahMNM

I watched my homeboy die the other day. Not physically, he’s fine but emotionally he’s looking like batman after the fight with Bane. Why it stands out to me is cause it was the last thing to happen for us in 2013. Him getting his emotional spine broken over a knee and me watching as the ball dropped and people cheered.

Here’s what happened. New Years Eve 2013 11:58 p.m. around a vip table in a popping nightclub. Champagne flutes being poured, me making plans with the bottle girl to kiss each other in two minutes, other homies with their significant others or chicks they’ve been working on, single friends looking for other single people. Everybody is happy, everybody is chilling, everybody is living, we looking like a classy rap video. Then my homeboy killed himself by opening up his Instagram account to take a picture. First thing he saw was his ex girlfriend who he was in love with checking some dudes tonsils with her tongue with the caption “Couldn’t wait the 5 minutes lol #love #kiss #newyears”. I know this cause I was standing next to him with his TV sized android phone watching the life drain out of him as the countdown was ending 2013. He dragged himself into 2014 because he had to and that’s only cause no one but me knew what had just happened but me and him knew that he died in 2013. He was visibly off and his confidence was gone, but he had to try to grind through it cause he was expected to be life of the party as usual. Son looked like he just wanted to go home and listen to 808 & Heartbreaks on repeat until he fell asleep. I mean dude was in a packed club surrounded by women,friends, and alcohol at 12:05 a.m. on New Years day and looked like he should be somewhere on suicide watch.

The point of that story? DON’T FOLLOW YOUR EXES ON ANY TYPE OF SOCIAL MEDIA! Ain’t no good coming from that. Looking at something you had and don’t want anymore is a waste of your time and so is looking at something you want and can’t have,it’s a waste of time and emotion. You walking down the path to sadness and self hate. My nigga is that what you want? You think you gonna log in one day and see a status/picture/video with them saying they was wrong begging you to forgive them so you two can live happily ever after but you not though. You gonna log in one day and have your soul Shang Tsung’d by a status/picture/video of them being happy,moving on, and giving zero fucks about you and yours. It’s only a matter of time and when it does happen it’s gonna make you sick. Every time you log in on whatever and see your ex living life you just looking at one of your failures. You wouldn’t want someone reminding you of one of your unsuccessful ventures everyday so why would you do it to yourself? If you really care about this person and your sanity then let them know how you feel, but if it’s over over you gotta hit that unfriend/unfollow button. If not for you then do it for the person out there trying to eye fuck you and have a connection with you that you not noticing cause you staring at your ex picture of two plates of food with a man-sized portion and a woman sized portion. Oh you ain’t even see that person did you? That’s life, you miss a lot of important shit looking at and dealing with shit that you don’t really need to. Anyway, the flychologist is the relationship expert but that’s just my little slice of advice to take with you into 2014 to help you become the best you that you can be.Peace Out.

#Love #Kiss #NewYears

Show You How to Hustle Vol. 2 by @TrillahMNM

Posted: November 23, 2013 in The Trill Spot
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Ever had a girl you were trying to fuck for a hot minute but she did what bitches do and fronted and played hard to get so you eventually threw in the towel? Let me show you how to hustle.

1. Locate– find her hopefully by herself cause there’s strength in numbers and you don’t want her to have a support system around to throw off what’s about to go down,but if you can’t catch her by herself then just find a quick moment alone.

2. The Male Thirst Trap – Make a little small talk, then out of nowhere tell her “You know, I was in love with you ever since the first time I saw you but I didn’t say anything cause we didn’t really know each other and that would’ve came off weird and creepy. I guess it doesn’t really matter now since we’ve both moved on to other things .” Tell her it was nice seeing her again and make up a reason or excuse on why you have to leave. Then go have a conversation with another female while never leaving her line of sight. It don’t matter if you ask the new chick you talking to for directions to the nearest McDonald’s as long as you and her are smiling and the first bitch can see you then you good.

3. The Wait– Now you just chill and do your thing, go out and live life with a smile on your face.It’s only a matter of time before that chick tries to insert herself back in your life. Could happen 3 seconds after step two,could happen 3 months after step two but it will happen. Why? Cause bitches love to lean on happy niggas to make them happy when they aren’t happy. That’s how the friendzone was created.

4.The Sex Trap– Alright she came back to you, that means the ball is in your hands. Play it cool and walk her right into a sex trap. Only be available to hang out at your spot after the sun goes down and nowhere else. Have a good night with her, use your skills to get the box that you’re halfway in already.(You don’t have any skills, then email us, we’ll give you some) Close out the night and make her leave as we learned in the now legendary blog No New Feelings

5. The Soul Lust or The Soul Crush– This is the fork in the road. You got what you came for, do you shit on her or do you not shit on her? Only you can answer that but make sure you factor in the curvings and their reasons and that she’s only fucking with you cause she thinks you’re in love with her lonely ass. If you really like her and think you can build on that then good luck with that. Hopefully it works out and you got you a queen. BUT….If you a bitter nigga like me and can’t look past being curved by bitches that have no business curving you , Crush her soul and start curving her. Dodge calls,tweets,emails, and treat her like she’s a jehovahs witness knocking at your door if she stops by unexpectedly. When you do actually talk to her again confront her about all the curves she gave you and let her know you aren’t some fallback consolation prize ass nigga.

Congratulations! You just created another bitter chick and kept the cycle of niggas and bitches ain’t shit going for another generation. Just remember,she started it, you just beat her at it.

Disclaimer: TheFlychologist.com is not responsible for any broken windows,keyed cars,older brothers or cousins coming to your residence or place of employment to fight you, fake pregnancy test or anything else a scorned woman can think off. You are on your own with that.